I have a feeling like I’m growing up again, just faster.

If the sabbatical and the trip around the world was like a huge time out to live as a kid, carefree, doing what I wanted, whenever and wherever I wanted, then coming back feels like a fast track to responsible adulthood.

I always thought of me as being organized, having everything under control, my life on a tight leash and knowing where to head. Studies, traineeships, work, masters degree, work, EU competition, etc, etc…

And now I realize, I don’t. That’s not me, not really, or not any more. A few examples:

After 12 years I realized my health insurance is not fully covering hospital stays… Only 80%. I need additional cover! However, I’m procrastinating and can’t really bother to check the differences…

Can someone tell me what to do? I’m inclined to just take the cover a colleague has. For lack of wanting to deal with the details.

I am looking to buy an apartment. I have seen two banks, to get a grasp of how a loan works and have them flood me with figures and tables. But I start to see clearer now, that it’s all one one sheet. 10 years. 15 years. Mortgage costs. Fees. Insurances… It feels so grown-up!

I’ll have to decide this fast, or I’ll never do it. For there are too many options and things to consider.

Can someone just decide for me please?

Or maybe I don’t want all that. And just save most of my money for the next crazy project.

Recently, I told a colleague over lunch that I feel like growing up. I have to deal with adult stuff again. Maybe it’s time for that. I’m 40.  Now. Or never.

Well, maybe never?

I think I should see a life coach.